Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Deadly Dolphins go AWOL

This image was originally posted at Eurocbc.org

A year ago I wrote about how the Pentagon research folks, DARPA, were trying to turn rats and sharks into tomorrow's soldiers. The post, Bigger Breasts and Sharks in the Corps, never mentioned dolphins.

Sunday's Observer had this headline that caught my eye Armed and dangerous - Flipper the firing dolphin let loose by Katrina which adds dolphins to the list of secret Pentagon weapons, and then informs us that a number of these aquatic assassins may be missing.

It may be the oddest tale to emerge from the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Armed dolphins, trained by the US military to shoot terrorists and pinpoint spies underwater, may be missing in the Gulf of Mexico.

'My concern is that they have learnt to shoot at divers in wetsuits who have simulated terrorists in exercises. If divers or windsurfers are mistaken for a spy or suicide bomber and if equipped with special harnesses carrying toxic darts, they could fire,' he said. 'The darts are designed to put the target to sleep so they can be interrogated later, but what happens if the victim is not found for hours?'

So there's a bunch of deadly dolphins on the lamb. They may be equipped with poison darts, and they may not be able to tell the difference between innocent windsurfers and suicide bombers.

It's kind of like how the London Metropolitan Police can't tell the difference between innocent electricians and suicide bombers, or how the Israeli Defense Forces can't tell the difference between pregnant women and suicide bombers, or how the US Military can't tell the difference between Italian journalists and suicide bombers.

These are some of the reasons why I can no longer tell the difference between the London Metropolitan Police, the Israeli Defense Forces, the US Military and the terrorists they claim to be hunting. They all seem the same to me. This is because there is really no difference between terrorism and counter-terrorism. It's just different sides doing the same things. What's a dolphin to do?


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Red A said...

I'm appalled. Next thing you know we'll be using dogs or horses in warfare. I am appalled.

I think I'll cuddle up with my cat after she's done keeping my house free of vermin.

Actually, sarcasm aside, the Egyptians tried to domesticate the crocodile and failed...so there's one less Navy weapons platform to worry about.